Yesterday we began our discussion of negative thinking disease. Today I would like to continue those thoughts a bit more as we look at the on-board built-in GPS in our brains.
GPS?
GPS devices are now everywhere, including on our phones and built into our cars. This was not the case a few years ago. We bought our first stand alone, plug into the car's cigarette lighter GPS when we lived in Boston. We were tired of getting lost in the tunnels and always ending up on the wrong bridge the opposite of where we were trying to go. Then there was the additional issue that Massachusetts does not place street signs at every corner. Printed maps were of no use if you couldn't find elm Street because there was no signage for Elm Street!
So the GPS revolutionized our ability to get around that large city, and it gave me the confidence to strike out on my own and head anywhere, knowing I was one push of the "go home" button away from anywhere, so that I could never again be truly lost. It definitely changed my life for the better!
And the same can be said once I finally tapped into my personal Goodness Potential System in my brain! Let's explore this amazing feature we all have.
As mentioned, in order to use GPS, we have to turn it on, input our destination, trust it, and then listen carefully for its Good Orderly Directions. Talking back to it is futile, right? (If you have a GPS that has discussions with you in that way, please see a therapist.)
It's also best to make certain we aren't having involved conversations, talking on the phone, or playing music loudly enough to drown out the directions from the GPS. While we can sometimes visually look at the map, often they come at the very last minute we can opt for the correct lane. I've missed many a turn due to that.
It's the same with life. Sometimes we surround ourselves with so much noise and so many distractions or busy-ness or ways to numb ourselves that we can't hear those tiny, whispered Good Orderly Directions our brain GPS is trying to give us. Those little noodges and inspirational thoughts and ideas, those moments of "I should send a card to let her know I'm thinking of her".
As an example, the week my dear friend, Jean Cooper, died so unexpectedly, I was having all kinds of thoughts about calling her. But another friend told me I should wait another day or two before doing so because she hadn't been feeling well, so best not to disturb her. Instead of listening to my inner GPS, I listened to the friend, who told me to wait. She did so out of concern, of course, and couldn't have known that 24 hours later, Jean was gone, and I never got to make that last phone call to her, not even for 2 minutes to let her know I was thinking of her, praying for her, and that I loved her. That was my inner GPS noodging me. (And yes, noodge is a word. It's a Jewish nudge.)
It's also important to note that the GPS can't take us to the past, nor to the future. It only operates in the here and now. It doesn't say, "Well, you missed your turn so you might as well go back home." Right? No, it recalculates in the background and keeps us heading to our destination.
Our inner GPS works in the same way. It cannot take us to the past or the future, and it will recalculate an alternate route if we've missed a noodge. Sometimes, if we listen, we can feel the noodge to reassess if perhaps we should head to a different destination.
How do we know we are living in the past or future rather than in the present? We know by looking at our thoughts. The past is run on thoughts of guilt, regret, and blame, whether self-blame or blaming others. The future features worry, fear, and anxiety.
I have to confess, a few months ago, at bedtime every night and first thing every morning I was looking at the weather radar on my phone app and predicting how I would feel based on the temperature, humidity, rain, and barometric pressure, because all of those things drastically affect both the fibromyalgia and the arthritis. While weather watching isn't an issue per se, I was letting those facts and numbers decide how my day was going to be. I have since stopped doing that. I rarely even open that weather app now.
Weather is usually considered a neutral subject, or one about which we can mutually grouse, no matter where we are or with whom we are speaking. However, I let it become a whirlwind of worry and anxiety, fueled by a friend who was also doing that. Being anxious about it neither better prepares us nor helps in any way. It only fuels the anxiety. Our brains do not need extra anxiety fuel!
This is not to say don't check and take an umbrella with you on a day calling for rain, or take precautions about bad weather coming in. What I am saying is that there is a big difference in letting the facts inform us and letting them fuel anxiety and worry! There is a difference between venting a bit of frustration at needing to be out when the heat or rain is extreme, and constantly complaining about every single degree change!
Weather is but one example. We should neither let the past--with its regrets and shame and guilt and blame, especially blaming others for a fault or misunderstanding (that is likely just as much our fault as theirs)-- or the future--with its obsessive worries, fears, and anxieties-- rule the day. We prepare as best we can, and we keep moving forward, trusting our inner GPS and listening for its wise advice.
I also note that GPS devices now warn us of upcoming accidents or heavy traffic, and ask if we want to be rerouted. Our brain GPS can do the same thing, if we trust it and we listen carefully.
Why don't we do this? Because we spend an unbelievable amount of time, energy, head space, emotions, and resources worrying about the future and dwelling on the past, AND THEY DON'T EXIST. It is not our situations which create our reality, it is our THOUGHTS about our situations that create our reality and influence our experience. And thoughts are only thoughts. They are not the reality itself.
This is not to say that we should live in a state of perpetual "happiness" and la la la our way through by denying a tornado is on its way. No. We prepare, but we don't let the what ifs rule us, nor do we let thoughts of what others are going to think of us rule us. As well, we do not allow others to try and manipulate us into worry and fear and anxiety.
While it's good to say not to let worry, anxiety, and regrets rule our day, this begs the question, How can we clear out the past and future which brings anxiety and blame?
We will continue here with Part 2 tomorrow... yes, I left you with a cliff hanger.....
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